Chapter 181: I'm not perfect
I pushed him in an instant when I heard his question.
"What kind of question is that?"
"Because I haven't heard you say it back,"
"Seriously?"
"Hmhm..." he hummed and to my surprise, he held both my hands and his face turned serious all of a sudden."Sweetheart, I know I'm not perfect. I've never been a perfect father to our daughter, or a perfect boyfriend for these past few months and I know I was far from
being a perfect husband to you back then---"
"Wait a minute---what are you talking about? Why are you suddenly discussing perfection?"
"Because I know, if you were given the chance to go back in time you would choose David over me because he's perfect."
My mouth hung open when he started to speak.
"He's perfect in everything, from his looks, attitude and most of all, he has never hurt you. You have a better future in him than in me."
"Luke---"
"But sweetheart, I'm here, I've changed. I love you and even though I know I was far from being David, I'll do everything to be the man you deserve and the father that Cali deserves."
"So you heard our conversation," it was not a question, but a confirmation. The conversation I was referring to was the one Jack and I had in the kitchen a few days ago. "Yes," he nodded.
"But you said you didn't hear us talking? Wait, which part of our conversation did you start hearing?"
"From the moment Jack asked you about David,"
"So that means you heard---"
"Yes, everything. I heard everything you said about him and how you would choose him if you were only given the chance to do so."
"Whoa!" I couldn't help but chuckle when his face showed jealousy. "But I asked if you heard what we were talking about and you said no, so what did you lie?"
"Yeah, I lied because what's the point of telling the truth then?"
"Ohh... so was the reason you were avoiding me these past few days because you were jealous?"
"Not just jealous but I was hurt too, and I wasn't avoiding you,"
"Haha... really? Then why didn't you come back to visit me? Didn't you say you won't stop until I believe you?"
"Because I had to calm myself down. I wanted to touch you, I wanted to kiss you and hold you every time I see you or when you're near me but I couldn't! So to be able to stop myself from doing what you surely won't like, I decided not to visit you."
"Okay," I said nodding. "But I just hope you talked to me and asked me about what you heard so that it would have been clear to you that you had a different understanding of what I said. Or, I hope you didn't show up right away or maybe you stayed hidden for a little while so you would have heard what I have to say next."
His mouth opened but no words came out.
"If only you had stayed hidden for a little longer that time, maybe you would have heard that even if we turn back time or we go back to the past, I will still choose you... I will still love you. I will still be the craziest woman as you described me back then," "Why? Why would you do that when you knew what I did to you? When you knew how much I hurt you, ignored your feelings, and made your life as crazy as hell?"
I smiled.
"Because I love you... and because I love you, I'm ready to go back to all that because I know that in the end, you will love me as much as I love you. And because I believe that everything that happens or has happened has a reason. Everything... even all decisions made also have a reason..."
"And if I could turn the hands of time
and would be given the chance to choose which life I would choose, I would still choose the life where you are with me even if there are pain or painful memories. In fact, I wouldn't change a thing. Because I felt like everything in my life and everything I've done in the past hasded me to where I am now. My choices... mistakes... heartbreaks...
everything..."
"Because if I had done one thing differently, I might never have met the new version of myself. I may never have improved. I may have never experienced joy, love, and happiness when I am with you, and most of all, I may have never had Cassandra Lizeth Soriano Williams in my life."
I ended that long speech with a sweet smile but guess what I got? Nothing! He didn't open his mouth to say anything. He just stood there in front of me, staring at me as if he couldn't believe what I said.
But then... tears welled up in his eyes causing me to gasp and hold his hands.
"I don't know what I did in my past life to deserve you. Maybe I must have done something right or something great to deserve your love. How did I ever get so damn lucky?"
"Ahh..." I smiled widely, wiping the tears from his face. I don't know but seeing him like that makes my heart melt in joy and so much love.
"Thank you, Sam,"
"For what?" I asked with a frown.
"Thank you for loving me. Thank you
for choosing to be with me, for being my daughter's mother, and for everything you've done for our family. I may not be a perfect man or husband in the future, but there's one thing I could promise, I love you will love you and Cali and our family and you will be the only woman to whom I will dedicate my heart until my last breath."
"The only woman? Then what about Cali and your Mom?" I asked, grinning.
"Of course, they are different,"
"Hmm... alright," I shrugged and bit my lower lip to contain my excitement... but I didn't know it was a very wrong move.
He immediately freed my lip from my teeth using his thumb and I held my breath as he did that. I felt the intensity of his gaze as he looked at me and then at my lips. I gulped, moistening my suddenly dry lips from the way he was staring at them. And when our eyes met, a sudden feeling of wanting and excitement filled me and his eyes reflected the same.
"Sam..." He whispered, his minty breath fanned across my face and it made me shiver deep down.
"Hmmm?" I just hummed as my mind already went blank at that moment. The only thing playing on my mind at that time was to kiss those red enticing lips.novelbin
I know he felt the same. I know he was feeling what I was feeling at that time because it didn't take long and he finally did what was on my mind. The next few seconds I know, we moved onto the couch with him on top of me and with lips moving in sync in a hungry, demanding kiss making all my insides melt from excitement.
A soft moan escaped my throat as his lips traveled down my neck and his hands started drawing circles on my waist.
"Oh, God! I don't know how much longer I can hold it, sweetheart,"
But after he awakened all my senses and I almost went crazy with his every touch, he then suddenly stopped and was about to get up if I hadn't grabbed his arm and stopped him from getting up.
"Hey! Wait--- what are you doing? Where are you going?" I asked, I know my eyes held a silent protest.
"Sweetheart, I have to stop now or else I won't be able to hold myself back later," he replied, his voice containing pain as if stopping was also against his will but he was thinking of me and how I would feel.
A chuckle left my lips as I pulled him by his collar and whispered...
"And who told you to stop!"
"Sweetheart?"
"And most of all, who told you to hold yourself back?" I grinned, chewing my lip and purposely teasing him using my right knee
which was in between his legs. "et
missed you," I whispered again and I didn't miss how he gritted his teeth. I'm sure it was not because of what I whispered but because he already felt my knee grinding under his member.
And that's it!
He grabbed my hips, kissing me hard and almost leaving me breathless. Our kiss turned into petting and he pressed hard onto the couch. My hands once again wandered on his body and when I reached the hem of his shirt, I lifted it off his body with no words coming out of our lips.
He pulled me close again to him and kissed me while his hands fumbled with the hook of my bra. I almost died in excitement when I felt the warmth of his touch on my chest. I even arched my body toward him when I felt his lips on my neck again. But we haven't gotten into the most exciting part when we heard the doorbell ring three times.