Chapter 15
Chapter 15
Sometimes something hurts us so badly but we don't even know why. And then it feels like that
unknown reason hurts even deeper, with thousands times more power. When we don't know the
answer to a question, it's alright. But when we try hard to understand what the question itself means
but fail, that's unbearable. Because then we can't even try to find out the answer.
Failure is bad. Not even getting the chance to win is worse.
I know I am in pain. But when I don't know what is causing the pain, how will I find the cure?
I don't know why I am feeling like this. It's just that seeing them kissing hurts a bit. Maybe it hurts more
than a bit.
I did know he is a player. He uses girls and throws them away. I knew everything. Leah told me, didn't
she?
Then why am I feeling dizzy? Why does it feel like someone betrays me? Why am I blinking too much?
When Nick told me maybe Ethan feels something for me, I brushed it off. But did my subconscious
mind begin to believe that? Is it why I am feeling betrayed now?
Or the answer is different?
Everything Ethan is doing, the reason behind his anger when he sees me with Nick, is it because he
also feels the same way I am feeling right now?
Betrayed? Hurt? Angry? Disappointed? Heartbreak?
What is right?
What should I believe?
I didn't realize I was staring at them for too long when Nick shakes my hand. It's like I was in another
world.
I look at him to see his hurtful face. He definitely didn't expect it was coming. He grips my hand tightly
as if trying to console me. But why do I need that?
Just why?
DAMNIT!
"Evie, let's get out of here," Nick says slowly, holding my arm.
I don't answer. I am feeling too numb to do anything. He leads me to the exit and I just follow him. I
don't dare to look back at them again.
When we get outside, I let out a huge breath I don't know I am holding.
Ethan kissed her...
How could he?
Who's that girl?
But why do I care?
His life is his. I don't have any right to talk about that. But how could I refrain my heart from the pain if it
doesn't want to?
"Where's Leah?" I croak as we head towards our car.
"She is already into the car. She just messaged me." Nick says and I nod.
Suddenly Nick stops walking and so do I. I give him a questioning look to which he just sighs.
"Evie, I am sorry." He says looking down.
"Why are you sorry?" I ask.
"I really thought maybe Ethan was jealous seeing us together. I thought he likes you. But I was wrong.
He just proved that. I'm so sorry." He says, biting his lips.
"Please don't apologize. You did nothing to say sorry for. Do you really think I took your words
seriously? Huh?" I try to smile but he just shakes his head, disappointed.
I see Leah staring at us from inside the car. Her face is dull and her head is resting against the window.
Nick's back is facing her so he doesn't see her watching us.
Everyone is hurt. We are hurting and we are being hurt as well.
"Evie?" Nick calls me, I look up at him.
"Hmm?"
"I know how you are feeling. Just forget everything. You are a gem. You deserve someone who has the
gut to cherish a gem. Don't ever feel hurt for someone who hurts you. Know that they lost something
precious hurting you. I love you, baby. Trust me everything will be okay." He assures me, cupping my
face.
But how?
I can't forget that moment. They were so close. I can't get that picture out of my mind.
I'm deep in my thoughts when suddenly Nick pulls me into a hug. I see Leah watching us with wide
eyes as pain flashes in her eyes. I try to pull apart but Nick holds me tightly rubbing his hand on my
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"Everything will be alright. Just hold on." He whispers.
And I feel myself slowly giving in his arms. When pain takes over our hearts, maybe then just then we
need someone to hold us like this, to tell us everything will be alright, to assure us. Maybe everything
won't be alright but we still need someone to help us to get over the hard times of life.
I know I sound selfish.
I'm hurting Leah.
But right now, my own feelings are taking over me. And this embrace, those soothing words seem to
calm me down. I try but I finally give up. I rest my head on his shoulder and take a deep breath. And
with that, the burden I was having a while ago seems to go away...a bit.
Maybe he is right.
Everything will be alright.